When a relationship finds itself in a rut, it is important to change monotonous patterns. A useful option is to attempt to mimic what the relationship was like during its earlier phases. It is specially recommended to take part in an activity that causes a surge of adrenaline. This excitement can help your partner and your relationship. Watching a scary movie, riding a roller coaster, going on vacation, or exercising together are good options. When you expect less, you get more from your partner. However, it is important for your partner to know your top two expectations. Conflict is inevitable in any situation, but there are ways to mitigate frustration. On average a happy couple has a 5 to 1 ratio of good experiences to bad experiences. To minimize negative feelings avoid constant fighting, keeping secrets, miscommunication, and problems with household chores. Consistent affective affirmation is useful for letting a person understand their value in your life. These are specially effective in men, since women are able to get these affirmations from other people in their lives. An affirmative action is telling your partner that "they are your best friend."
Use communication to learn about the other person's inner world. The ten minute rule states that one should spend at least ten minuets everyday talking about something other than family, work, obligations, or your relationship. The point of this is to get to know your partner better. In contrast to popular belief, it is okay to go to bed angry. Staying up late at night can worsen a situation. Late at night solving skills slump, and people are unlikely to fight fairly. A good night's sleep can help you see the situation differently the next morning.